La Seduction

All right readers, get your mind out of the gutter, this post is just a book review.  But it is a review of a book all about the art of seduction in France, and "how the French play the game of life".

I really enjoyed La Seduction!  It was one of several books I received for Christmas on the French and their culture.  It offered insight into the role seduction plays in relations between men and women, fashion, food, and politics.  Sciolino was the Paris bureau chief for the New York Times and has had the opportunity to discuss seduction with many politically and culturally important people such as Carla Bruni, Guy Savoy, Ines de la Fressange, and various ambassadors to France. 

The book opens by discussing the different meanings of "seduction" in French and English.  In American English, seduction is more seen as something negative or sinister.  The seduced was "led astray" by the seducer.  The French interpret the word in a more positive light, if someone was seduced, they could have merely been "charmed" by the someone.  According to the author, the French style of seduction permeates everyday life. 

Par example, one of the chapters in the book is called "You Never Know".  The expression, on ne sait jamais which translates into "one never knows".  Basically the saying means that you never know who's watching you or who you might bump into, so you should look decent all the time.  Even when running down to your neighborhood boulangerie for a baguette.  And from first hand experience, I know this to be true.  I have seen many sloppily dressed people in the grocery stores back home, but not here.  Why do the French dress up to go grocery shopping? "Because there is the odd chance that the window cleaner might whistle, and if he does, my day will be sunnier!" 

Now if that scenario happened in the good old U.S of A, that window cleaner would most likely be sued for sexual harassment so fast his head would spin around.  But this kind of compliment is explained as a "connection with the other" and that when out and about in Paris (or any town in France) the scenery looks nice, so you should too.  Obviously any rude or aggressive comments from strangers on the street is another story.  The book also mentions a French woman who moved to Chicago and "felt out of place because she got dressed up everyday and no one seemed to notice."  Now I LOVE my sweatpants as much as the next girl, but I understand where the French are coming from.  And I have not worn my beloved sweatpants outside the apartment.  Now it may sound obvious, but the people (and women in particular) of Paris dress to impress.  Not in an over the top way, but they definitely do not just roll out of bed and throw whatever on.  They might want to look like their style is effortless, but I am certain it's not.  And what's wrong with a compliment here and there?  I know compliments always brighten my day.  And my friends and I have been the subject of admiration on the street once or twice already!  It's been nothing more than "vous etes belle" or "you are pretty" said in passing.  La Seduction is not about giving compliments that cross the harassment line.  It's about appreciating the fact that someone took the time to look nice today, for themselves and for everyone else. 

The second half of the book is mostly about seduction in politics.  One thing that is very different between American politicians and French politicians is their personal lives.  If you are going to make it in the US as a politician, you need a squeaky clean record; no skeletons in the closet.  As soon as a scandal breaks, you're done.  However in France, your personal life is just that, it's personal.  Former President Francois Mitterand had a daughter out of wedlock with his mistress.  When asked about the matter, he simply said, "Yes it's true.  And so what? It's none of the public's business."  At his funeral, his mistress and their daughter stood next to his wife and son.  Apparently, the French didn't care about his second family!  They only became upset when it was discovered that Mitterand gave them state protection.  It's an election year here in France as well, and I have yet to see any smear campaigns. Whether it's because nobody cares or because there's so much dirt on everyone anyway, je ne sais pas! 

Bisous,

Allison